No matter how many times I’ve gone through this, it’s always such a miracle, and makes me pause often in wonder.
9 months is such a concrete and specific amount of time. Some weeks feel never ending, some months fly by in a blur (like the nesting intensity of the 2nd trimester). I found myself wanting to pause, be unplugged more this pregnancy—savoring this season and allowing myself to be aware of how it’s shaping me and the family, as we transition into our next chapter.
As we prepare to welcome a new life in April, I’m reflecting on these last nine months and sharing some of the ways I stay energized, grounded, and peaceful during pregnancy and post-partum.
Finding Out and the Early Days of Pregnancy
When we found out about this pregnancy, in early August, we just had to laugh. We had just survived a week long power outage due to a crazy summer hurricane, and only 2 weeks before had dived headfirst into our basement reno and were planning our first year of homeschooling (something I swore I’d never do, but now love fiercely). Crazy, but perfect timing, as always. It was truly a beautiful gift and a welcome one, but the exhaustion and nausea was more extreme with this one than it had been with my last (with Blaise I was happily unaware of my pregnancy until almost 18 weeks).
So the first days, while blessed, due to a wonderful live-in mothers’ helper and the long end of summer days when kids can happily play outside, were about rest. In the afternoons, instead of working I napped, happily outsourcing dinner prep most nights when my nausea was more extreme, and falling into bed wiped out in a way I wasn’t prepared for.
I was reminded once again (lessons of 2020) to be grateful to be able to strip away life to just the essentials. Not doing any more than was needed, and calling on help in large and small ways. This is a gift I’ve learned to do along the way—no super mom cape worn here—I just want a smoothly functioning household, happy kids, and the mental space needed to run a business and of course, continual home projects which bring me/us a lot of joy.
The First Trimester: An Invitation to Trust
Anyone who’s been through a miscarriage or baby loss in the first trimester knows what a mental and emotional journey it can be.
Every moment that you feel sick or exhausted or have strong signs of hormones wreaking havoc on your sense of normalcy, you can be relieved because it feels like thing is are going to be all right. Any moment you feel good for a few hours, or if the nausea subsides or you feel energized and “normal,” you begin to wonder—”is this normal? Is everything ok? Should I be concerned?” I definitely felt that tension this time around, and marveled at moms who have it much worse in terms of how sick they get—pregnancy is truly an act of self-gift in every way.
We kept the pregnancy a suprise (publically) until nearly half-way this time for various reasons, and it was fun to announce our “tie-breaker.” Not seeing people as often meant that it was an easier secret to keep!
We aren’t finding out the gender with this pregnancy, so how I’m feeling has led to lots of guessing about gender. The girls know that the pregnancies with them were slightly harder on me…so we’re speculating, but excited to be totally surprised.
Preparing with the Kids
I see the nearing of the end of Blaise’ days of being the baby, and it’s bittersweet—he truly captured our hearts from the first moment with his sweet spirit, and has been the most lively, precious, fun and uniting presence all this time, making us just enjoy every moment of his first 2 years. And now watching him transition to a more toddler and “big boy” awareness is beautiful, but also crazy to me. I’m being intentional about getting weekly outings out with each of the kids alone, and enjoying each of them for who they are right now, before everything shifts again.
Welcoming a new sibling certainly is a huge life adjustment, no matter the age or stage of development, and I’m more aware of preparing with them/through them this time around.
Second Trimester: Nesting, Home Renos, and Holidays
The nesting was fierce this pregnancy. Having the holidays/Christmas season during 2nd trimester was a blessing—we did a lot of celebrating, had a blast, and while “Santa” may have had complete pregnancy brain and forgotten where (s)he hid half the gifts that trickled in by packages, much less remembered to wrap them, it was a very special season indeed.
We’ve done so many home reno details that were lingering after the long pause during the 2020 lockdown. Now, we’re full swing in phase 2 (basement) and the finishing details with a renewed intentionality and motivation to get things to a certain place before baby. Everyone loves a good deadline, and I’m thrilled about some of the space transformations that are being driven forward by this baby timeline.
Meanwhile, I’ve loved the focused energy on selecting details and making decisions; I’m already decisive but nesting makes me even more proactive and organized about our process! My husband is doing his own form of nesting by making sure we get all the details figured out for our complete basement makeover and making plans/budgeting for outdoor projects coming soon.
Third Trimester: Winter Rhythms and Slowing Down
Now, as we hunker down to survive the chilly early spring in CT, and enjoy coming out of a full month of snow days, hibernation and cozy winter moments, I’m grateful for both permission to nap by the fire and the extra hours for nesting projects like refinishing furniture pieces, and hanging shelves.
It’s been a reminder yet again (with work opportunities, goals, and schooling rhythms) that it’s all about taking life one day at a time, as it comes, simplifying to essentials and leaning joyfully into those, having no guilt about the other 1000 things that you’re not doing while in flow with kids or on home front around a specific topic or activity.
In this final trimester, I’m welcoming the support of iron transfusions to finish strong and prep well for birth (along with acupuncture, PT, reflexology and daily walks/teas). It’s important to embrace whatever is needed to make you at your best, during these final delicate and ever-changing months before baby.
The Joy of Welcoming a Baby in the Spring
We’re happily anticipating spring as the moment when everything will shift once again.
This is my first pregnancy following the seasons in that way, and giving birth in the spring (I have summer, fall and winter babies). I truly love it, it feels so in tune with nature’s ways…just like babies always appear on farms and in the wild, come spring. It has made the hibernation season and anticipation of a wonderful spring and summer with baby that much richer.
(Have any of you, readers, had spring babies? Did you experience this unique joy of being joined with Mother Nature and the seasons? Please reach out if so and let me know, I am curious about this now).
Pregnancy is when care for self is most evidently care for others, although much of motherhood invites us into this mystery.
As I embrace the invitation for deeper layers of rest and self-care during this pregnancy—yes, even while staying busy with homeschooling and home projects, it’s a reminder of what we’re willing to do for others. When I know that being at my best will also be best for baby, I run out of excuses to put off caring for myself.
For me, that’s been regular running this pregnancy (up until 29 weeks) and lots of walks, lots of sleep, magnesium/epsom salt baths, all the nourishing foods and intuitive eating (the best time to do it when cravings are so real, and so meaningful). It means regular reflexology, PT when I can get it in, and just being aware of what my body needs, respecting the process and how unique it is every time.
It’s such an important reminder, and even when it comes to the ebb and flow of my work, my creative process, the motivation I have for home transformations, and how I can focus in on the others, it’s important to just end each day in gratitude for the strength, energy and focus to be able to do these things, while growing a human. And the growing a human effort is always what takes precedence if I know something has to shift or give.
This little one has taught me to be fiercely grateful for the chance and reminder to take life one day at a time, as it comes, never knowing when things will shift, but thankful for the chance to be aware and experience all of it.
I am eagerly awaiting this spring baby, and thankful for all the lessons and experiences of this particular pregnancy. This baby is a gift from 2020, and we just can’t wait to meet him or her (once we get a tiny bit further down the list of home projects and nesting ;)).
At the end of this post, I share more resources about my favorite prenatal regimen and how I have “so much energy” during pregnancy. You know I’m passionate about sharing this and coaching other mommas who are on their journeys to having thriving pregnancies, births and postpartum experiences.
I think the habits, both physical and mental, that you set up during mid to late pregnancy are crucial for determining how you’ll do in postpartum. You also need to be rallying all the support you can find for those beautiful and fragile first weeks with baby so you can rest and recover together.
I’m enjoying these final weeks waiting for baby, grateful that we made time last week for a mini babymoon/weekend getaway, thrilled to have family coming through for visits, and generally just taking life a few days at a time.
Some days it feels still unreal, I’m waiting for the reality of it to sink in, and yet I know that everything about the past months has been a beautiful, focused preparation season on so many fronts…and we’re nearly ready.
2021 has already proven to be a year of expansion, beautiful surprises, abundance and new blessings. I believe this baby will be the culmination of all of that, and we’ll spend the summer getting to know him/her, and adjusting our family, home and life rhythms in accordance with the gift.
New life always brings with it an expansion, a deeper sense of God’s gifts and our true purpose here: to love. We’re so thrilled to be in the life phase of welcoming this growth and this little one.
OTHER RESOURCES/POSTS about pregnancy you might appreciate:
*The best prenatal on the planet…here’s why
*Thriving pregnancy: my top tools and daily habits (published 2018)
*Roundup and guide to pregnancy snacking
*Prepping your pantry and freezer for postpartum life
*What’s inside my birth/hospital bag (2 years ago, with Blaise).
*Quick link: my favorite pre-natal–take the quiz to customize your prenatal nutrition regimen
Pregnant? Schedule your 30 minute Inspired Pregnancy Consultation with me.